Colossians 3 v 12- 4 v 1

A few weeks ago, I conducted my first wedding since Lockdown according to the new Covid Guidelines.  It was a lovely wedding, though a second marriage for both, following the early death of the groom’s first wife and the bride’s coming out of troubled first marriage.  And the reading they had chosen was Colossians 3.  But it was interesting that the reading only went up to the end of v17 and when he ended the reader casually said, “I notice you didn’t want me to continue the reading…” and both Bride and Groom made a joke about the ‘wives submit to your husbands’ being a bit outdated and controversial.

Although in days gone by, it doesn’t seem to have controversial at all!  Some of you will remember Harry Secombe, you remember the rather rotund Welsh singer and comedian.  And on the occasion of his Golden Wedding anniversary he was asked “Have there been any arguments or disagreements during your 50 years of marriage?” To which Harry replied “When we got married my wife suggested that I take all the big decisions and she would make the smaller day to day one’s.  And it’s interesting how in that 50 years there haven’t been any big decisions to take.”  You can tell who wore the trousers in that house!

But seriously, if you think that this Bible passage is all about submission, obedience and being under the thumb of your husband, or your parent in the case of children or your master, in the case of slaves, then I would respectively suggest that you have missed the point of this passage.

One of the things that I have been doing more during Lockdown has been spending more time alone with God.  One of the on-line aids for me has been the Lectio 365.  This is a short reflection by Pete Greig and the team from 24/7 Prayer.  You may have heard Pete’s daily reflections from on-line Spring Harvest event.  They were really good and I can recommend them and Lectio 365.  It’s an app that you can look up on your phone.  Why not try it?

Last Monday in the Lectio 365 reflection, they re-iterated the underlying tenets of their organisation.  Let me quote now “There are six practices that put into action three loves at the heart of Lectio 365.  Throughout the year, we explore how we can love God through prayer and creativity, love others through justice and hospitality and show love for the world through mission and learning.”

And when I heard that I wanted to share it with you since, I think it is love for God that is at the heart of this passage.  And this love for God is reflected in submission to following his way and being obedient to his will. 

That’s a summary of v 12 – 17.  And in my Bible 3 v 18 – 4 v 1 is entitled the ‘rules for Christian Households’ This section is an outworking of this love for God as it pans out in family life.

Let me explain.

Love for God –  v 12-17

There has been a lot of talk in recent weeks about the ‘new normal’ that is the way in which are able to exist, carry on life, socialise and behave within the new way of being following the appearance of Covid 19 and the Global pandemic.  In a commentary on Colossians by R.C.Lucas he talks about when we are transformed by encounter with Jesus then we become ‘new’ people existing in a new creation. “The new creation” according to R.C. Lucas is “a society where the barriers that separate us from one another in this world are abolished.” And he goes on to say “It is a marvellous dream.  But, in practical terms, what a risky claim to make!  Can it begin to reveal itself in reality?” 

The only way that this new creation can become a reality is if individuals submit themselves to God’s new way and become obedient to his will.  That is to say, if we clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and peace.  Bearing with each other and forgiving each other.

There has not been a stronger test during my lifetime of relationships within the home or workplace than during Lockdown.  You will have heard how the incidence of domestic violence, physical and sexual abuse of children, and apparently divorce applications are the highest they have ever been, and incidents of unfair and unsafe work practices have proliferated at this time. 

That’s because of the strains and pressures that Lockdown has created have been enormous.  People are saying that trends that were in evidence before Lockdown have accelerated during Lockdown and as yet, I do not think we are aware of the true cost of Lockdown and the pandemic on mental health and relationships especially within the home. 

However, an encouraging trend for me, and naturally this is only anecdotal at present, within some households and many Christian households, I have heard of how parents have enjoyed spending more time with their children, and relationships between husbands and wives have become cemented rather than only being loose bonds, and ships that pass by in the night.  Working at home, though stressful at times has its advantages in that there’s less time devoted to travelling to work and this ‘spare’ time can be invested into care for the family.  For example, a couple I know who have been married nearly 30 years, and have both been furloughed from their work told me they had spent much more time with each other than at any point in their marriage, and this had in their words ‘cemented their relationship’.

In some situations, there has been more evidence of people being ‘good neighbours’ and showing compassion, kindness and love within communities, and support and friendship has grown during this time.

Hence, our love for God has shown itself in greater love for our nuclear family, the church family and the community and neighbourhood around where people live

How can love for God show itself within Christian Households v 18 – 1

This is something that Paul highlights in these verses.  “Husbands love your wives” v19 and “Fathers do not embitter or provoke” your children v21 and 4 v1 “Masters, provide for your slaves what is right.”  Be good employers!

The key here is that ‘love must be sincere’.  Paul warns against hypocrisy.        In v 22 Paul tells the slaves, to work ‘with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord’ but this sincerity is equally applicable in relations between husbands and wives, and parents and children, let me tell you a story to illustrate.

There was a young man. He has been married to his wife for several years and they would often visit her parents for dinner or perhaps enjoy a walk all together. The young man was exceptionally respectful of his father-in-law, who had a spent his career serving Queen and country in the armed forces. The young man would always address him “Sir” and would firmly shake his hand or stand as his father-in-law entered to room to greet him. He would make an effort to dress well and be respectful in his conversation. However, within their own home, the young man’s attitude toward his wife was cold. He was disrespectful. He did not share any of the household chores and treated his wife as more of a servant than a partner. Someone, who was forced to submit to him, rather than to willingly submit to his loving and caring example.  He talked down to her and was unnecessarily rude and short with her often. When with friends, he would ridicule his wife, making jokes out of when she had made a mistake or said something that he considered to be stupid. So we question…did that young man really respect his father-in-law, despite appearances when in his company? He had found a way of saying the right things in public, but his actions in private were not showing love to God

So, I ask the question, does the way we behave as husbands or wives, parents or children, as employers or employees, in easy circumstances, and in circumstances of extreme stress and tension during Lockdown, show that we are v12 “God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved.”?

By the way, please don’t beat yourself up if the last thing you did before coming to the zoom service was shout at the kids or have an argument with your wife or husband.  God knows that we are fallible and make mistakes.

One of the books that I have been reading during Lockdown has been an account of St. Francis life and someone that we immediately associate with a peaceful life must be St. Francis.  However, his relationship with his parents as he was growing especially with his father left an awful lot to be desired.  And I haven’t got to the bit where they make it yet! 

You see this family relationships stuff is very much a work in progress even in the most godly of families!

Conclusion

The key to understanding this passage is to grasp how high and long and broad and deep is God’s love for you personally.  As a result of which each of us individually will willingly submit ourselves to God’s new way and become obedient to his will.  That is to say, we will clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and peace.  Bearing with each other and forgiving each other.  And this will bring about unity in our church and peace in our homes.

Let’s pray.

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace; 
Where there is hatred, let me sow love; 
Where there is injury, pardon; 
Where there is doubt, faith; 
Where there is despair, hope; 
Where there is darkness, light; 
And where there is sadness, joy. 

O Divine Master,
Grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console; 
To be understood, as to understand; 
To be loved, as to love; 
For it is in giving that we receive, 
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned, 
And it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life. 
Amen.

Prayers for 2 August 2020

Did you spot the prayer idea in the church notices last Sunday?

‘Begin with thanks and praise’

And that’s what we will do this morning.

We praise you Lord for you are good and your love endures for ever. You are faithful, you are massively powerful, you are near to us.  You are supreme over all, and yet you are concerned deeply about us.  You are full of compassion toward us.

And we can thank you for the things we sometimes take for granted each day.  For our homes where we can shelter from the rain, for fresh clean water, for friendships, especially those friendships which help us draw closer to you.  Although it’s rather strange, we thank you that we can meet like this, hearing and seeing one another, and being able to worship you and listen to you.

Thank you, Lord, that throughout the whole of this lockdown time the work with our children has continued.  We appreciate those in our church family who have worked so hard to make this happen.

This month we focus in our mission prayers on Simon and Becky, working in London, particularly with families from a Muslim background.  Eid is a special Muslim festival being celebrated this weekend.  It is as important to them as Christmas or Easter is to us.  We pray as they spend time visiting their own families, for the first time for many months, that they would understand that Jesus is so much more than just a prophet – He is the king who desires to be the head of every family on earth.

We read in the letter to the believers in Colossae

‘Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts’

We ask Lord for that peace in our own hearts this morning.  Where we are sad, when we are upset, where we are uncertain, where we know that we are unwell and worried about it.  Thank you, Father that you give us your peace for this next hour, for this day, for each new day.

Amen


Category: Prayers , Sermons , The Bridge

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